Johnny Says He's Bound By Only Six Strings To This World

Recently I asked a request of a friend who's musical opinion I hold in very high stand (that, and a number of other amazing qualities of character he has that he'd not believe me if I listed them here, so I won't!).  I asked for recommendations for a few new bands to check out.  Note the words 'a few' here dear audience (who am I kidding?!  I know it's only me who ever comes on this page!).  To put Jon's musical taste pedigree into context, two of my five favourite ever albums were courtesy of his recommendations.

I got one or two more suggestions than I expected, so decided in order to make some sense of them, and to figure which I need to remember and return to, I would blog them.  I've not decided exactly how to do this yet, it's a bit of a work in progress... It may be one entry that I come back to, or the start of a series.  I quite like the idea of a series, all with Jon related titles... God, I need more to do with my life!

This is the whole list, up to yesterday, likely to be updated I'm sure before long:

Poison The Well
Every Time I Die
Refused
Unearth
Throwdown
August Burns Red
Alexisonfire
Norma Jean
The Rise
Bleeding Through
From Autumn To Ashes
The After Dinner Playback
Boy Sets Fire
Walls Of Jericho
The Chariot
Horse The Band
Gutworm
Fugazi
Botch
Bane
Blacklisted
Hondo Maclean
Darkest Hour
Hopesfall
Dillinger Escape Plan
Open Hand
As Friends Rust
As I Lay Dying
The Bled
Daughters
Atreyu
Caliban
Waterdown
Cave In
The Chariot
Coalesce
Converge
Coalesce
Pig Destroyer
Give Up The Ghost
Kids Near Water
This Girl
Inhale Exhale
Old Man Gloom
Stampin Ground
Stretch Armstrong
Senses Fail
Shai Hulud
Unearth
Thursday
Throwdown
Johnny Truant
Shadows Fall
Lamb of God
Parkway Drive
Pitchshifter
Eden Maine
Far
Old Man Gloom
Eve 6
Evergreen Terrace

Man, that's a long list.
Okay, so here's the one's I've listened to and my thoughts:


  • Poison The Well - I bought You Come Before You in 2003, liked it, but it never impacted massively on me as I've not bought anything since.  Courtesy of Wikipedia, I know they had some kind of mass hiatus from the band late 2000's, so was curious to hear if there's an obvious impact on the music at all.  Listening to The Tropic Rot, the moments of melodic singing have a nagging familiarity to them.  In a good way I mean.  In some ways it's reminiscent of Gavin Rossdale, but with a touch of something else I can't quite grasp at the moment.  I like the album, in fact I liked it enough to buy it, and I think it'll become a regular player.  It's a good mix of screamo, catchy chorus's, a heavy beat that I can imagine being really pretty fucking driving when seeing them live.  Antartica Inside Me reminds me of Deftone's eponymous Shut Up and Drive, which can only be a good thing, surely?!    
  • Every Time I Die - I'm of the opinion that everyone should own a copy of Hot Damn!.  From the first furious beats of Romeo A Go Go to the sputtering fuzz out at the close of Pornogratherapy, it's a classy album.   I'm not sure how I've got to 31 not knowing about these guys, and even more, how I've not seen them live.  They feel on CD like the kind of band that really comes alive when playing to an audience.  They've such an energy that's almost palpable even through our sanitised and polished music productions of the 21st century.  Live that must just be insane.  
  • Refused - The Refused I've liked for a while, but kind of forgotten about.  I worked in a bakery when I was in school and college, and a lad there used to play them a whole lot.  This was a good opportunity to get reunited with them.  The Shape Of Punk To Come stands a pretty good chance of becoming one of those included on the '501 albums you should own' lists.  The thing about punk is that it often suits me politically.  But newer, American punk in particular, doesn't fit so well musically.  Refused blends the two though.  It has the message that I like - dissatisfied and pissed off and angry about it.  But with the raw metal edge and reasonable amount of screamo riding the heavy bass work.  I know I just said everyone should own Hot Damn!, but everyone really really should own this gem.   It's the kind of level that the likes of The Gallows can probably only dream of reaching.  
  • Alexisonfire - I bought Alexisonfire and Old Crows/Young Cardinals after having heard .44 Calibre Love Letter from the former and Young Cardinals from the latter just once.  I'm a fairly impulsive CD buyer, so that in itself isn't really that big of a deal.  But it's rare that I buy two from the same band on the strength of one or two songs.  Alexisonfire are addictive.  The more I listened to, the more I wanted to listen.  And the louder I wanted to listen to it.  It's angry, passionate, rich, and leaves you wanting more.  It's the musical version of sex.  Enough said! 
  • August Burns Red - I could go on about ABR for some time.  I'm a little bit in love with Mariana's Trench.  I couldn't tell you how many times I've played this live gig recording.  Their melodic riffs are just incredible.  You know how sometimes when guitar playing is so intricate but seemingly effortless you just get captivated watching it? Yeah, that.  The guitar that kicks in around 1.45 on White Washed and just keeps going and going is beyond (that's a Welsh thing, I'm not sure if it translates well elsewhere.  It's too good, too much, it's beyond).  
  • Norma Jean - Norma Jean were described to me as 'punch people in the face music', which is a fairly accurate description I'd say.  I can imagine seeing them somewhere dark, intimate, hot and sweaty.  And I can imagine it being one of the most intense and powerful gigs that you could experience.  Sometimes songs that open the way Face:Face does are too hostile and they lose me before I can get a hold of it or understanding of it.  But Norma Jean hook you in instead, they drag you into their tracks and it somehow becomes in sync with you, with the rhythms and pulses of your body.  Perhaps that's why that description of 'punch people in the face music' is so apt.  Because when I listen to it, it becomes part of me, takes me over to a degree, but in a way where we're in time.  Like how I'd imagine a boarder feels when they're riding that seemingly impenitrable wave with nothing guiding them but the feel of the wave beneath their feet and the beat of their heart. 
  • The Rise - You have to have time for The Rise, if nothing more than for the amount of time and thought they must have put into their song titles.  But a good title, does not a good track make.  Luckily for them though, on the whole the fancy title is worth the track inside.  I'd imagine these guys spent a bit of time listening to Nine Inch Nails in their youths.  That touch of electronica, and not being scared to mix chunks of something that wouldn't be amiss in an edgy dance track, with some detailed and complex guitar and drum work works well.  It's genuinely not an easy mix to get right, and many band have fallen short.  They're bit like Sybreed if Sybreed had a clearer idea of who they are.  Having said that, there is a point in An Automated Response If You Will where I think for a moment in time I'm listening to Less Than Jake. 
  • Parkway Drive - According to last.fm if you like August Burns Red, and we've ascertained that I do, then I should also be liking Parkway Drive.  And I do.  But just not in the same way as ABR.  They feel a little bit more mainstream.  A bit more ten-a-penny.  Talented and enjoyable, and I'd not mind owning their stuff.  But there's others I'd much rather buy first.  They feel a little bit like the filler tracks that the likes of Metal Hammer or Kerrang! used in and around the bands that they really thought were worth promoting and were that extra level of special on their promotional CD's. 
  • Pitschshifter - One of the things I love about Jon's band suggestions is part of what gives his knowledge that level of provenance in my opinion, and that's that it's a broad range of bands in style and in time too.  He didn't just suggest new bands for me to discover.  He suggested older one for me to rediscover  - and that's helpful for my bank account!  www.pitchshifter.com has a lovely familiarity to it despite my never really listening to it before.  It was released in 1999, the same year we were literally rocked by classics like RATM's The Battle of Los Angeles, NiN's The Fragile, American Head Charge gave us Trepanation and Slipknot smacked us over the head with their mask covered metal gifts.  And you can feel that in the music.  It feels 1999 but not in an old, relevant only then kind of way. More in an it's comfortable and familiar and I understand where it's coming from and what it is kind of a way.  I missed out on them 14 years ago, but better late than never! 
  • Cave In - I saw Cave In probably about ten years ago at Reading Festival.  If I'd not been there seeing them they'd probably have made more of an impact on me than they did.  I was a bit too absorbed with who else I was seeing that day to pay much attention.  So I clicked on the highest listened to track in the last six months on last.fm: Inspire.  It's friendly and welcoming from the start.  It's that kind of music I could have on for a long journey - sing along with, enjoy but not really pay much attention to or feel the need to break a speed limit, or play bumper cars on the motor way to.  It's family friendly, spouting out lyrics like 'who inspires you?'.  But scratch a little deeper, and by which I mean earlier, and you find Jupiter.  It's still got that wholesome, bit to clean and tidy sound to it, but it's also a bit quirky.  It has a north African, Morroccon shisha den riff going on that I really like.  But then it's also got the lyrics 'the metronome was wrong again, my heart has surely gone and skipped a beat, now the rhythm is all right, and I can understand your point of view'.  Ultimately Cave In, I like you, because there's nothing to dislike.  But I wish you'd get a bit angry, get a bit pissed off with the world and scream a bit.  I don't want to hear you understanding their point of view!  Maybe another day I'd like them more, but tonight, I'm pissed off with the world and this just isn't hitting the button for me. 
  • Pig Destroyer - Hmm.  Technically I expect these guys are amazing.  After asking why so many songs were less than a minute long, the response I got was 'probably to give the drummer a rest'.  This makes sense.  It's mental.  Like proper mental.  Everything is fast and furious, and in a good way.  I would say it's a bit too much screamo or growling or whatever the fashionable term is for that these days.  I like a fair bit of that, don't get me wrong.  But I also like to be able to sing along to something.  I guess there's also something there about me having been brought up on a hell of a lot of prog rock.  40 seconds into a prog rock song and the intro hasn't really begun, let alone the whole song being over.  So, I'm sorry Pig Destroyer, while I appreciate you, you're not being added to my collection.  Also, you've a fucking ridiculous name. 
  • The Dillinger Escape Plan  - yep yep, like like like.  I was aware of them in the late 1990's, they were quite regular in Kerrang! for a while there.  Another band who's changed lined up's quite distinctively over the years with the swapping of lead singers.  They're obviously a talented bunch of musicians.  43% Burnt is like a showcase of all the different styles, genres, and sub-genres they've mastered between themselves.  It's a little messy, a little, um, like they're trying too hard I think.  But it's interesting, and intriguing, and sounds a bit like how my head is feeling - disjointed and chaotic.  Which is oddly comforting.  That was a live version I've been listening to though, probably should listen to the album version too...   I'm fairly sure The Running Board has become one of my new favourite songs.  Skipping forward to Ire Works, and I'm impressed with their newer stuff too.  I'm not sure it's really too comparable with their earlier stuff, it's cleaner, smoother, crisper, funkier.  But I'm a fan of both.  Sadly, I won't be owning Calculating Infinity any time soon as I'm not a fan enough to spend £40 on an import. Pity. 
  • Walls Of Jericho - I have issue with girls singing.  I'm trying to get over it.  I blame Kitty myself.  I am a Distillers fan, and love a bit of Snake River Conspiracy and going old school Tura Satana.  But Walls of Jericho? Nope.  She's hot. But that's about it.  Infact, they make me quite angry, and I think it's fairly irrational, so I'm walking away now.  I do wonder if I'm doing them a bit of an injustice, and maybe should listen again some time.  But for now, they can do one. 
  • Eve 6 - I thought I'd listened to these guys. Turns out I've only listened to one song.  And that's not enough to comment on. So they'll appear later. 


Is this in my head? I don't know what to think

These past few days I've spent a lot of time chatting with some friends about their feelings, and about mine.  All completely different issues, and I've no intention on disclosing any of them; those are not my stories to tell.  Mine I may tell another day..

The thing all four of us have in common is 'over thinking'.  Is over thinking the curse of my generation?  Have we been educated, and saturated by communication so much that we now cannot make a rational response and go with it?  When did we lose our gut instinct? If our stone-age ancestors over thought things the way we do, they would have starved to death long before they'd made a decision on what animal to hunt, what spear to use, who to share it all with and what it all means by doing it.  

I over think.  I then realise I'm over thinking.  And over think why I'm over thinking things.  I can't switch it off.  It's like I'm hosting an alien in my brain that lives on thoughts that I have to keep churning out for it to survive.  RIght now I'm trying not to think too much about why I've not had a text back - are they fed up with me?  Have they finally decided they can't be nice any more and really it's time to just ignore me in hopes I'll go away.  I think I've now moved into neurosis and paranoia...

Back to over thinking.  I'm trying to be more spontaneous.  Obviously a certain degree of thinking is sensible, often it's essential.  But over thinking cripples.  It's held me in a limbo state for a long time.  Stopped me from experiencing things and going for what I want in life. Actually. That's bollocks.  If I'm getting anywhere with this, I need to be honest.  I've allowed myself to over think, and then used that myself from experiencing things and going for what I want in life.  Nobody's over thinking things for me, it's me doing it.  

Perhaps we're not doing enough of that stuff our ancestors used to face every day.  Perhaps we've allowed life to get too safe and mundane.  And anything that threatens that placidity is so alien that we analyse it to the millionth degree.  Perhaps we need a metaphorical woolly mammoth or something to face every day.  If you survive that then hell, telling someone you love them or moving or starting a new career, or whatever you're over thinking at this moment, seems a hell of a lot of a less scary task and needs a whole lot less thinking about.  

I can't promise to change over night.  I know I'm idealistic and can be naive, but I'm not stupid.  I can promise to engender that change in myself though.  And maybe by me doing it, I can figure the path to be able to help my three over thinkers to a mind less noisy too.  

PS, yes, the title of this is Taylor Swift lyrics!

She could be, she could be, she could be so wrong

Two posts in 24 hours after only 1 this entire year... Must be on annual leave! On an aside about that, I am sure I wrote a couple of entries that are no longer on my blog, and one of them has chunks missing. I've also no idea what's going on with the text on my 30 songs page.  Which is all very weird.  

Anyway.

After falling asleep around 4.30 I got about 6 hours of reasonably uninterrupted sleep.  No disturbing dreams or nightmares last night so I'm happy with that  I've also woken up having found something else while I was asleep... yes, I found perspective!  

As per usual, the issue(s) lie(s) with with me. I do feel like I'm drifting away from some friends.  But that's okay.   It's happened before, I survived it, and it will happen again and again over the  years.  Instead of reading it as being that I'm rubbish and have frightened people off, I'm positively reframing (counsellor is back) the situation.  

I'm so blessed that a lot of my friends have been around for the majority of my life.  Which makes it all the stranger to think of life without them in it in the way they have been.  If we're meant to be friends forever, we will be.  If we're not, we won't.  And somehow in my 6 hours sleep I managed to find a degree of peace with that.  I'm still not happy or okay about it, but I'm on my journey there.  And that's as good as any of us can do.

I never knew her name, I only knew her fame

I remember hearing a character on a film saying a line roughly worded as "I'm surrounded by people every day, but have never felt so lonely".  I didn't really get it at the time.  Surrounded by people, voices filling your head, hands filling yours, heart reacting to their stories and anecdotes.  How could you possibly feel alone?
At 01.55 and for what feels like the millionth night in a row I can't sleep.  And at 01.55 the world feels like a fucking lonely place.  Marginally more so than my days do at the moment.  I've caught up with a few old friends recently - a couple of weddings, a good friend home from the north for a few days, others local that I've just not had chance to see.  So how can I be lonely?  How can I be alone?  Is there a difference between those two?  I'm not sure...
The trouble with seeing those lovely friends is the come down after.  That point where the silence is a little louder in my ears.  A little more stifling of breath.  
I've always struggled to believe my friends really want me in their lives.  That's not a reflection on them at all.  I adore my friends, each and every beautiful one of them and they're fantastic people.  It's a deep seated negative automatic thought linked to childhood bullying.  For the most part I can fight this feeling well.  Every now and again though it just gets a bit too tough.  I feel like I'm a bit of a spare part.  Their lives are moving on in whatever direction and the role I played is a bit surplus to requirements now.  I'm aware that is doing my friends a real disservice here.  And if any of them ever read this then I want you to know this is my screwed up head talking. 
It's also how I feel with my family too.  I feel alone in my little family.  Like I'm on this path running alongside but never converges and joins them.  Do you ever question the point of your existence? I don't mean in a suicidal way.  I mean literally the point of you... With Dad being poorly, and set to get worse, a few friends have said it's time for me to be able to give back.  Which is true.  But is it wrong that I don't want to do that?  I do, I obviously do want to help him and support my mum.  But I want to fall apart about it too.  I want to cry and kick things and run away.  I want to not feel like I have to go see my parents every day to help my mum.  
I'm not sure the point of this entry.  Other than writing has always helped me process and make sense of things.  I've not found an answer to this feeling.  In honesty I didn't expect to.  But it's my feeling, so for me to do something about it.  Just once I've figured out what that is... 

We Fell In Love With A Dying Culture Like Circling Vultures, We Fell In Love With The Lies

So over the last couple of weeks, the sleepy little railway-works town I call home has been on major news channels up and down the country.  We have literally been inundated with press, politicians, party members and pamphleteers - we are being picked over like vultures pecking away at the only fresh carcass for miles.  Elections in themselves aren't that blog-worthy for me: you get the leaflets, news reports and party political broadcasts, so what makes this one different?  We are having to elect a new MP with the resignation of Chris Huhne following his dalliance in the dock of the local law courts.  All of a sudden, here in Eastleigh, Hampshire, we're top of the list for film crews and the elite of British politics.  

London will keep shipping down their political bigwigs for another week: I will keep avoiding Nigel Farage at all costs, Maria Hitching's comments on the local schools will continue to follow me around and fuel an irate fire inside, John O'Farrell's complete ignorance of anything to do with Eastleigh will carry on being just a bit pathetic and laughable.  But unlike our esteemed David Cameron MP, I am aware that the candidates are not the most important people in all of this, the constituents are.  So as I work my way through the inevitably massive pile of leaflets I will receive between now and Thursday, I will keep that in mind.  I will think about what I as a constituent want, rather than what annoys me about them, and seek out for who is going to best meet the needs of our sleepy little railway-works town that is  my home.  

Welcome To A New Kind Of Tension, All Across The Alien Nation

Musicals get a bad press.  I'm not sure why... talented dancers: check, talented singers: check, talented musicians: check.  What's not to like?  Cheese is what's not to like.  The saccharine, wholesome, moral, dare I say it - Americanistic feel good musical where everyone lives happily ever after and is all very glee (with a capital and a little 'g').

I love musicals.  Or rather, I love musicals that make you think and feel and react emotionally.  Musicals that affect you and stay with you.  Musicals you return to time and time again long after you've left the confines of your velvet seat in row F on the balcony floor.

I'm happy to say American Idiot had that reaction from me on Saturday night.  Writing a rock opera (to give it it's deserved proper title) is a fucking hard thing to do.  That's why American Idiot is only the fourth recognised one ever to be penned*.  Tommy and Quadrophenia being two of my very favourite musical creations ever dreamt up, for me, Green Day had some fairly major boots to fill.

They also faced a fair amount of public speculation how technically good it could be in terms of musicality etc given that they are a punk band, and the age old misapprehension that punk is not a musical genre that is 'good enough' to be taken seriously on the same stage that has been home to masterpieces of the likes of Lord Andrew Lloyd Webber.  Being a long term punk fan, and a die hard defender of the importance of the punk genre, and that it's not an angry white man shouting over the same three chords and a five piece drum kit, I wanted Green Day to prove the disbelievers to be wrong once and for all.  Having said that, the last thing I wanted was for them to stop being true to their punk roots and be a band for the masses.  Punk is and always should be a niche in my opinion.

I wasn't expecting much from them then!... for some people who weren't Green Day to do justice to performing Green Day songs (a favourite band for half my life), to live up to my love for other rock opera's, and to balance on that thin line between being understood and embraced by the masses whilst also still being a punk performance through and through.

American Idiot is a clever, clever concept.  It chronicles the life of Jesus of Suburbia and his two friends, disillusioned with the mundane sameness and stifled by their life in American suburbia, and what happens when they attempt to break free.  Each character has a choice, follow rage or follow love... journeys which brings them face to face with the great American dream, terror, love, passion, sex, drug addiction, music, suicide, friendship, desperation, glory, regret, parenthood, loneliness, death and life.  Subjects like these could have a musical each, it could have gone hideously wrong by trying to incorporate them all in less than two hours of music.   Billie Joe pulled it off though.  Written in the wake of 9/11, nobody could have blamed him for creating an openly scathing attack on the American government and the decision to go to war in the middle east.  Instead he turned this around and made it about the everyman.  He looked at why people were signing up for a war nobody believed in, at what was causing people to want to break free, about why swathes of the world were/are so anti-American.  In short, the impact on you and me.

To return to the nuances of the musical itself: the first act was angry, it was punchy, it set the scene - for the most part despite the dissatisfaction and disaffection felt by the main trio, it was a glamorous feeling world that was pulling me in, making me want to walk away from my safe job and safe flat and look for something more than all of this.  (not a feeling I'm unfamiliar with, but that's for another time).  The second half took the power to a whole other place.  It was heart breaking, desolate, hopeful, desperate, humbling, angering and empowering all at once.  I know the American Idiot album very well and love it.  I wanted to feel it on another level though.  I wanted to feel about American Idiot how I've felt when I've been to see Tommy - despite knowing every word, each time I've seen Tommy I've felt it in every nerve and every sensory organ in my body.  That is what I wanted from American Idiot on Saturday night.  And I'm happy to say that's what I got.   




*This is a controversial statement to write, it can and has been argued that Pink Floyd's 'The Wall' and David Bowie's 'Ziggy Stardust & The Spiders From Mars' are just two more examples of a rock opera. For reasons I won't go into now, I happen to disagree with this statement.  Maybe another blog entry for another time.

You Say Goodbye And I Say Hello

Young people today are in the midst of a sociologist's dream - watching the impact of growing up with social networking in our lives.  You could debate for hours about whether or not it's ultimately a good thing for our young people - indeed, having spent the last year working with those being sexually exploited and seeing the part it plays in their lives, I could argue a pretty solid case against it for hours.  

I'm one of many who have voiced the concern that in many ways it hinders communication - proper communication where you take the time to pen a letter or to pick up a phone, or meet someone for coffee and properly converse one on one sans distraction.  I know what pretty much everyone I went to school with is doing, despite not having spoken to most of them in 14 years and actually not really caring that much either.  

Today was different though.  Today social networking meant I reconnected with someone I lost touch with around 12 years ago and it's been ace.  Someone I follow on Twitter, and am friends with on Facebook, and actually I do see in the human form from time to time happened to retweet something posted by this person I'd lost touch with.  I did a little Twitter stalking to check it was the person I believed him to be, and then when discovering it was, I tweeted him.  (as an aside, the person who'd retweeted him and he don't actually know each other, just my old friend is in the music industry and has many many followers).  Thus ensued an evening of catch up tweeting, ending with promises from both parties to meet up next time he's home.  

Tonight was a reminder of the genuinely innocent goodness that social networks can bring - the re-kindling of old friendships that bring a smile and a bounce of step.  So thanks JB for retweeting a strangers comment about liking tea, you made my day!